So I had 3 classes today and 3 completely different experiences:

~I’d like to interrupt to say I teach High School… okay, that’s it… continue Jeremy~

In the first class there are 12 boys and 2 girls. The boys in this class are OBSESSED with soccer. They don’t want to do anything but play soccer. Other the other hand, the principle wants me to teach a well rounded class full of stretching, exercise and many sports. So what’s a teacher to do? Simple, I dangle soccer in front of the students like a carrot in front of a horse.  They do anything I say with the hope of playing soccer in return. And even towards the end of class, when I let them play soccer, I can blow a whistle and everyone will immediately begin doing pushups because they are terrified I might take the ball away…

The second class is the worst class… ever. There is a student who speaks English fairly well for a Haitian (his trademark phrase: “Do you like it…. or do you luuuuuuuve it”) He also thinks he’s extremely cool and American (he has never been outside Cabaret). This class had 5 boys and 4 girls. These boys think it’s hilarious to make fun of me and do nothing I say. Today that cumulated with the English speaking boy saying to me, “Shut the F@*% Up!” So I said “okay” and got the principle and tried to explain to him what happen. My explanation kinda got lost in translation with the principle as he came down and told the boys not to say that (the word for “must” in Creole sounds identical to the eff word in English, so he thought the student said “must” in Creole and I took offense at the word, not the context). Good did come out of the situation though because the principle stayed for the whole period and watched our class. In Haiti, teachers can hit students and students get physical punishment for misbehaving. So they are basically scared straight and with the principle present, I know the boys would do everything I said. So I told the girls they could leave and for one whole hour I ran, lunged and wall sat the boys into submission. When we first started running and were conveniently far enough away from the principle to hear, the boys (excited by escaping discipline from the principle) continued to crack jokes to which I simply replied, “Okay, tout Comic yo pral kouri” meaning “Okay, all comedians will run.” And like Forest, I just ran and ran and ran.  During the course of the class I heard cries of “Sispan kouri, w’ap touye nou” (Stop, you are killing us) and “M’ pa comic” (I am not a comedian). By the end of the class, I pulled aside a select few of the sweat drenched students to talk to them about respect. And it went surprisingly really well.

The third class is prolly my favorite class. 4 guys and 4 girls. We get along great because I think they’re funny and they think I’m funny- it’s a winning combination. They come up with clever and crafty ways to be sick or injured so they don’t have to do anything (gotta respect the creativity). So today I taught them karate, making it up along the way.

 
Deborah
11/11/2009 09:57:03 pm

Haha, love it! Sounds like you're doing a great job teaching!

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ginny
11/13/2009 10:26:43 pm

I bet your former coaches are laughing and saying " What goes around..."

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skyle
11/15/2009 02:43:33 pm

i am not a comedian!!

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8/12/2012 11:05:04 am

Pretty good post.i am very enjoy reading your article!

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